Sunday, July 12, 2015

Fill Your Soul with "Batman Begins"

When is the last time you watched something that opened your heart and filled you with pure joy?  That was the feeling I had after watching the charming documentary, "Batkid Begins," in Kendall Square this weekend.  It tells the story of five-year old Miles Scott, suffering from leukemia, who, with help from the Make a Wish Foundation and numerous other volunteers, gets to be "Batkid" for a day.  San Francisco is the setting for Gotham City by the Bay.  This wonderful 90-minute feature depicts how it all came together from a simple idea that grew and grew, with outpouring support from thousands of strangers.  In our jaded world where it often seems that everyone is out for something, this was an extremely pleasant change of pace.

The movie restored my faith in humanity.  People just wanted to be a part of this fantastic event and were not seeking anything in return.  Miles got to be Batman's sidekick, save a damsel in distress, and foil the Riddler and the Penguin along the way.  And although it may sound like a sad flick, that is not the case.  Sure, it may bring a few tears to your eyes -- but they will be tears of joy.  You can watch the movie with your guard down and fill your soul with what we all hope mankind can and should be.

After the movie, you will want to volunteer for a cause, donate to those in need, and/or come up with a crazy idea that can turn into something truly wonderful to help others.  If there is only one movie you see this year, make it "Batman Begins!"  I only wish the theater was as full as my heart was after the movie -- so please spread the word so others can appreciate this wonderful, unique experience, too!

Tuesday, March 24, 2015

I Got a New Attitude!

With the constant snow and cold this past winter, maintaining a positive attitude has been quite difficult.  Even as I write this during the first week of spring, temperatures are well below what they should be, and the frigid air makes it tough to look on the bright side when your eyes are watering from the constant chill.  I keep reminding clients to seek out fun in warm places like Russell's Garden Center in Wayland, an indoor tropical paradise, or to rise above it all by walking in the air at the BeanStalk Adventure Ropes Course inside Jordan's Furniture in Reading.  But let's face it, outside distractions can only take us so far.  It is what is on the inside that really counts to help us face those gloomy, tough days.

You've heard the expression "attitude is everything."  True, it is hard to get motivated when you're down and things have not gone your way.  There is comfort in one's misery - similar to wearing your favorite worn-out sweatshirt. Wallowing in self-pity has its perks, such as eating a pint of Ben and Jerry's or binge-watching Lifetime movies with a box of tissues next to you.  But after being there for more than a day, we often still feel lousy. Taking time for yourself to recuperate and relax is a good thing.  But holding onto a belief system that we should remain inside our own head, feel like the world owes us, or think we deserve to be treated badly, is far from healthy.  That is when your attitude really matters most.  The key is remembering we have a choice as to whether we want to make it better or remain instead in that worn-out, pitiful sweatshirt desperately in need of a wash.

Take this example from the movie, Skeleton Twins.  Kristin Wiig and Bill Hader, play brother and sister going through extremely tough times.  In this particular scene (click for the Youtube video), Wiig is frustrated that life isn't going her way so Hader tries to gear her through song in a different direction.  He tries unsuccessfully for a few minutes, but eventually she breaks down and joins him, realizing that if just one person cares, that is all we need.  "Nothing's Gonna Stop Us Now" by Starship, a wonderfully upbeat, cheesy 80's ballad, transforms the situation. Unrealistic? Exactly the opposite.  She certainly could go back to self-pity right afterwards, but that, again, would be her choice.  And where is that going to get her?  Not very far from her couch.

Attitude matters and can make all the difference -- along with just one person (or pet!) who cares.  Our attitude is determined by the choices we make and vice versa.  We CHOOSE our attitude.  It is not always easy but you're in great company - trust me!  Having the courage to change, risking failure, leaving your mark on the world by finding your own meaning, not taking yourself too seriously, making another person's day, and incorporating play into your everyday world are some specific ways to stay afloat in a what can be a weary world.  Life is an adventure where sometimes things go in your favor and other times not so much -- but it is what you make of it that truly counts.

All of these ideas are part of the FISH! book philosophy by Stephen Lundin.  It is a very short book, worthy of your consideration.  It also is this year's Community Read book choice for the Flint Public Library in Middleton so they have plenty of copies on hand.  Stop in and borrow one.

For more ideas on how to incorporate the FISH! philosophy into your everyday life and work, join me on Monday, April 27th from 6:30pm to 8pm at the Flint Public Library, One South Main Street in Middleton, for my motivational talk entitled "Finding Inspiration and Sharing Happiness: Enjoying Life with a New Attitude."  The talk is free and open to the public. And as anyone whose attended my talks knows, the night is always filled with humor and chocolate!  Hope to see you there!

Monday, January 19, 2015

Taking a Chance on Friendship

My forever friend Steven and me when he
 competed in the Special Olympics
When I was in ninth grade, I tutored a sixth grade boy named Steven.  I visited his school once a week and helped him with his assignments.  He wasn't like most students and he often got made fun of by others.  But his sincerity and loyalty endeared him to me.  I believed in him and he never forgot that.  We remained in touch throughout the years, typically through letters and cards, which always ended "Friends Forever." I am happy to say that 35 years later, he is still in my life.  When we saw each other for Christmas this year, we gave each other a gift.  To our shock, when we opened them, we had bought the same ornament for each other - a snowman with "Friends Forever" on it.  Of all of the millions of gifts in this world, ours was the very same one!  Incredible and magical -- just like our friendship.

That's the thing with friends.  You don't really know how special that person is going to be in your life.  You find yourself chatting one day with someone new and years later, that person has a special place in your heart.  You take random chances, trust, and hope against hope that you find others similar to you but with new perspectives.  We long for others who will care about us and help us on our path in life.  Those who have had similar experiences and survived.  And those with differing angles to open our mind when we need it most.

One of the most common complaints I hear is that good friends are tough to find.  We think because we are in the same grade or live on the same street, that we should be "besties."  But that is often far from true.  Great friends are often found in the most unique circumstances.  But because they may be inconvenient and take extra effort, we sometimes let them slide.

Take for instance, when we were on vacation in Tennessee a few years back and my son met a girl similar in age as well as her family at the hotel pool.  We chatted for a long time and enjoyed their company.  My son and the girl exchanged emails, not imagining it would go very far.  Emails turned to FaceTime, and since then they have become dear friends.  We have met them on three more vacations since then, even spending time at their home in Georgia.  We truly enjoy their company and are so glad we didn't toss their email in the trash because they lived too far away.  Today's technology and a little persistence changes that.

When the universe puts people in your path, pay attention.  They are there for a reason.  Follow your heart -- if someone connects with you, then spend some time trying to make it work, even if it is a bit inconvenient.  Sometimes "forever friends" are right in front of us, but we look past them.  They are often different and unique but their heart resonates with yours.  And that is exactly why you need them in your life.