Angels Among Us - Healing Grief

My heart aches and I feel hollow inside. My mind wanders and I'm exhausted from doing nothing. The world keeps going on around me and it is difficult to just keep up. Grief. Never easy.

My 91 year-old grandmother, who helped to raise me while my parents worked, passed away in late June. She had been ill and lived a long life - but still, how do you say goodbye to someone with whom you've had a profound connection your entire life?

I agreed to have a table at the Danvers Family Festival on June 25th to advertise Ever After. I had to give up my sister-in-law's baby shower in Connecticut that day because I had already committed to be at the festival and I wasn't happy about that. I sat in the rain-soaked field with my dear friend, Jeanne, wondering why we were there with so few people. It seemed like such a waste of time.

On the way home, I decided to stop by my parents' home to visit my grandmother. A short time later, with many of our family around her including my son, my grandmother left this world for the next. After some thought, I was grateful for having been there instead of Connecticut, feeling things do happen for a reason.

The day after her funeral, my family headed to a pre-planned vacation to Tennessee and Dollywood. Crazy timing, but since it couldn't be changed, we decided to forge ahead and go. We stopped at a Jack-in-the-Box (remember those?) for lunch. While I was telling my son a story of how I got suspended in 8th grade for going to the Jack-in-the-Box across the street from the school for French fries, he laughed. An elderly lady in line in front of us was so taken by my son that she kept on talking to him. She even went on to give him a hug and can you believe a dollar bill before she left? While here in the north, we probably would consider her quite odd and try to pull our child away, her heart-warming nature was just what we needed. "She's an angel, Mom, sent by Nani Jay to remind us that she loves us. She even gave me money like Nani Jay used to do all the time before our trips." His great big smile proved it just had to be true.

Angels exist and things do happen for a reason. Kindness and compassion makes a difference. May you find comfort in the little things that make sense to you and know that you are far from alone in this world. Thank you, Nani Jay, for making me into the person I am and teaching me never to settle for the easy way out. You will continue to light our way in the days ahead.